Buying Affection!!

When I was a little girl dad would take us all down the corner store on a Monday afternoon with 20cents to buy a bag of lollies from Sam's shop! It was the highlight of our week. In our mixed bag of lollies there would be teeth, chalk, freckles, caramel and milk buds, and some raspberries. We loved it, and we loved dad for taking us.

Last Monday night my parents drove up to see us and dad took my kids down to the corner store, this time they each got $5.00 yep times have changed. $5.00 is more money than my twins have ever seen! It is definitely more money than any of my kids have ever spent on lollies at any one time, but they loved Poppy for it. It reminded me of when I was a little girl and how much I loved buying lollies with my dad.

They came home with a shopping bag full of lollies. They ate their lollies until they went to bed and again as soon as they woke up in the morning. I didn't mind, but Dame was not impressed.
Yesterday as I was getting ready for church Oliver came in and started to ask if he could have a muesli bar. Every morning as soon as he has eaten his breakfast he begins begging for food such as cookies, muesli bars, chips, basically some form of junk food. I can be a bit of a softy, because I like eating junk food every morning too!! Dame is firmer. So when he began begging Dame did not hesitate in saying, no! He continued to ask over and over, "But I really want one" "But I really need one" "I just want a muesli bar" "Give me one now" All the while getting louder and more annoying. I would have caved, if Dame wasn't there. Oli knows this so he was pretty determined to make me cave. Finally after more sooking I stood firm and said "No" Then, sensing I was about to weaken, I said "Daddy says no" So Oliver says with some serious attitude "I wonder what Poppy would say if he was dad!"

The cost of affection - $5.00!!

Tic-Tacs and Tactics!!

I have been a slack blogger lately, this is about to change. I hope after this entry that I will still have people who want to read my blog!!

I had a crazy dream last night, not unusual for me, I have a lot of crazy dreams. This one involved my best friend and some face slapping, it made me think about a not so proud moment in my life as a mum!

A few years ago, the child who really challenged me was my now gorgeous and although cheeky, pretty much perfect Landon. He is my 3rd child and he is an amazing kid. All my kids are amazing, what can I say!! Landon, is confident, popular, funny, fun, affectionate, and really easy-going. When he was younger he was sometimes in fact a lot of times, pretty naughty. I remember lots of days wanting to pull my hair out over the things he did.

This story is from about 2 and a half years ago, and like I said I'm not at all proud of this. It was a friday afternoon, the end of a long week. We had family from interstate staying with us, (which maybe added to my tension!) Landon had been going through a really rough stage with the twins. The twins were always in his way, according to him. They wrecked his building blocks, they went into his room when he was at school and touched his stuff, they just annoyed him in general, every second of every day! He had been pushing them over a lot and ripping toys off them that were his, or someone elses, and it was just a full on time. The twins were tough work until around the age of 3 when things finally started to settle! This particular afternoon, I was rushing like crazy. Noah had basket ball and I was dressing Sienna, I heard some screaming coming from the toy room, and as I rushed in to inspect what was going on I saw Landon slap Oliver across the face as hard as he could!!! I was horrified, Oliver was screaming, and so without thinking and in anger I flew across the room and slapped Landon across the face!! We were late for basket ball, so I scooped all the kids into the car and started the drive. What chaos, everyone was bawling. I was bawling, Landon was bawling, Oliver was bawling, Sienna was sympathetically bawling. It was nuts. When I finally got a hold of myself I was just saying over and over and over, "Landon I am so sorry, I am a bad bad bad mum" I was a mess. I wondered how I could possibly face the world, or confess to Damion, which I knew I needed to do quick before Landon did!! We arrived at basket ball, Noah hopped out of the car and I just sat in the car park still bawling, and wondering what to do now !

I said "Landon, I am so sorry. You did the wrong thing to Oliver, but what I did was even worse, what can I do to make it up to you?" He had stopped bawling a long time ago, and by now my kids were all just keen to get home again. He thought for a few seconds then said "Um, never make me eat vegetables again!!" I was still crying but now also laughing, and feeling relieved that he was going to forgive me. "I said I can't do that honey, is there anything else I can do?" He thought again and said "Buy me a pack of tic-tacs!!" I said I could definitely do that! When we got home we spent a long time cuddling and me telling him over and over how sorry I was and how much I loved him. I didn't stop kissing him until I was convinced he knew again.

I promised myself that day that I would get some new parenting tactics, and never ever discipline when I was feeling angry again! I am pleased to say I have kept that promise. If I feel like I am losing it, I give myself time-out, I go to my room, shut the door, and read a home magazine for a few minutes until I can deal with it like an adult!

A few months after that event with Landon, I was at the kids school teaching scripture. We were talking about how important it is to be nice to people even if they are mean to us. I asked the children if they had any questions, or comments. Landon raised his hand and said "Yeah like the time you slapped me across the face and I still loved you!" All the kids sat there with their mouths open, I went red then said "yep like that time, see even grown ups make mistakes sometimes."

When you stuff up, change your tactics, learn from mistakes, don't dwell on them, that's one of the most amazing things about kids, they love you unconditionally!

School Holidays

I have always been one of those crazy mum's who loves school holidays. I love the sleeping in, I love not making school lunches, I love having my kids around and just hanging out together. These holidays have been maybe the best I can remember.

The kids are getting to an age where they can have a bit more freedom, we are blessed to live in a quiet area they can ride to their mates houses who all live streets away, and there are always plenty of kids from the neighbourhood at our house. They can head to the local shops to buys lollies, they can go down to the warf, or the park. When they need food they come home. Its a good life.

These holidays we had sleep overs, a visit to Sydney to see their cousins, Nanny and Nono up from Melbourne, 2 days at the beach, lots of bike riding, movies, and kids, kids and more kids. It really doesn't get much better than that!

Achievements and Praise!!

There have been a few big achievements in the Tucci home this week!! First I found my camera!! My camera has been missing for nearly 2months, which is why my entries have been somewhat non-existent! I have been going crazy trying to locate my camera. The last time I remembered seeing it was at Easter. Last night Dame went to the state of origin and found my camera in his coat pocket! He had taken it with him to the Anzac day dawn service! Achievement number one!

Achievement numbers two and three go together, and are owned by the twins! Sienna and Oliver received gold medals (the plastic kind) today for blowing their noses on their own! A big achievement!! They have been wearing their medals with pride today and I am sure I will be seeing them around their necks for days to come.

I have found great success in using reward systems with my kids. We have had many a star chart on our fridge over the years. Stars for going to the toilet, stars for cleaning bedrooms, stars for making beds, stars for not getting into trouble at school. Stars for not fighting with each other.

I know the stars are not that exciting on their own, its what they represent that makes my kids want to do better, and be better. Being recognised is something we all thrive on. Imagine if every time we did something amazing, a group of people we loved and depended on were right there to acknowledge our efforts and praise us.

I think sometimes as we get older we hold back praise because we think that somehow by complimenting someone we lose a little of our own worth in the process. It is actually quite the opposite, the more praise we give to those around us, the better we feel about ourselves.

Praise, compliments, encouragement and positive reinforcement are all ways we can express love and that is something you can never have too much of. Our achievements can be endless when we have support from people we love, and we can help people around us achieve great things by the things we say to them, with or without a star chart!!

Get well mum!!

On Tuesday, I decided to take the kiddies on a road trip to see Kesh and Tim, (my sis and her hubby) They live near my grandparents and I really wanted to see my Pa. So I loaded the kids in the car and took off on the 3 hour drive south. The kids were great in the car, they watched a dvd and we danced to Michael Jackson, and shared a box of shapes. And we were there!! Kesh and Tim just bought a new puppy, my kids were very excited to meet her. We had a delicious dinner cooked by Kesh, then Oli got a high temperature and the fun was over. I had a very sleepless night, getting up to Oli, and Sienna, and Landon.

The next morning Tim and Kesh took the kids to the beach and Oli and I stayed home, I had a quick visit with my Pa, then, feeling like I could not face another sleepless night, packed the car and headed off on the long drive back home. Tim and Kesh were also sick, most of my kids were sniffy and Dame was also at home sick in bed! When we finally arrived back at our house I was feeling sick myself, and I was wasted. I went to bed last night at 6:30pm, and was feeling very fluey. This morning I woke up to Laith bringing Dame and I  breakfast in bed. Waffles, cut up apple, nuts, and 2 codral tablets. He also brought dame and I a hot lemon drink. He had all the kids draw us pictures that said get well and he had made me a card that said "To a loving, caring mum. Its terrible you're so sick. You being sick reminds me of the times that we've been sick and you've taken care of us no matter what. Now...it's my turn to give back. I want you to stay in bed all day and give me a call if you need me. Take good care of dad. And good luck getting better! Love from Laith"

Seriously what did I do to deserve the perfect kid??!! He is so fantastic. I stayed in bed til about 10, and it was the best sick day of my life!!!

My Easter Bonnet!!

When I was 7, I was in a church play and we sang the song "Easter bonnet" I was a flower. I remember feeling miserable in my green ribbed tights, my green skivvy, and crepe paper flower mask. The boy I loved was 11, he wore a shirt and bow tie and got to have a girl in a beautiful dress, with a beautiful bonnet walk around him and sit on his knee! I wanted desperately to have a beautiful Easter bonnet!!

This year I got to make an Easter bonnet!! Sienna is still not old enough to be needing an Easter hat so instead I made one for my girlfriends daughter Paris! She looked and felt very special, as all girls should. I love making Easter hats. This year only Landon needed a hat in my family. So I got to get out some of my creativity on my friends kids, she has 6 kids, 5 of which needed hats. We had 11 kids at her house and less than 2 hours to make 6 hats!! We had a few hiccups caused by a broken stapler, and no sticky tape, but when you have lots of kids you get resourceful!!

I will post some pics of the hats as well as some of the hats I have made in the past!! I usually get my materials from newsagents or $2 shops. This year because I wanted Paris's hat to be extra special I went to feather.com.au They have some amazing feathers, and are worth a look, check them out!!

Labours of Love

Our eldest child turned 12 yesterday. I struggle to believe I have a 12 year old. I remember very clearly when I turned 12. It does not seem that long ago! On Thursday night I was up making cookies for Laith to take into school the next day. I did not go to bed until friday morning at 1:57am!! That means a lot of quiet thinking time, as I baked the cookies.

I thought back to that night 12years ago before he was born. I was nervous and excited to finally be meeting this baby I had carried inside me and felt moving for so long. I was enormous with Laith, I had pre-eclampsia, and looked like someone had put a pump in my mouth and pumped me up til I was about to explode! It was not pretty. I was excited to meet my baby and to see my ankles again!

I thought about my labour with Laith, which was HELL!! He was a forceps delivery, and that is all I will say about that. He was just over 9pounds and felt he like I was birthing a watermelon, not a baby! During the whole labour I was saying over and over " I am never doing this again!" "I am never doing this again!" Then as soon as they handed him to me, I was bawling like a baby and I said "I want to do this again!!" Everyone was laughing, but I was instantly in love. He was perfect. He was mine. I cannot express in words how overwhelmed I was with love in that instant. He was worth all that hard work and sacrifice and would be worth any other work or sacrifice I would be required to make throughout his life.

Laith is pretty much a perfect kid, he has always been incredibly mature and responsible. He is so aware and sensitive to the needs of others, he is passionate about the environment, the is completely dedicated to his studies, he is affectionate, thoughtful, and he loves to laugh. He is organised and passionate. He is such a great example to his siblings, and he is my friend.

I thought about those things, I thought about the times he will come and sit next to me on the couch and cuddle me. The mornings he hops into bed with me for a chat. The times he will ask what I need help with and then just go and do it. I thought about the people he chooses to be friends with, and that he has never ever been in trouble at school. I thought about all the awards he has won, and how he is not at all boastful! I thought about him awake on Australia Day morning making breakfast for our family! I felt really glad that I could be up til 2am making cookies, making his day special because he is such a special kid.

I am so blessed that I get to play a part in Laiths life. I know Laith is going to achieve great things in his life, he already has. I am his mum, I get to share in those highs, and comfort him in the lows, right now my opinion matters to him more than anyone. Labours of love like giving birth or making cookies at 2am, are more love, less labour! And being a mum really is something I love. Happy birthday Laith, I could not be more proud of you.