Monday Morning!!

My friend asked me the other day "So what do you do all day?" He is a boy, so this blog is for him, and all the husbands out there who wonder what their wife does all day?

I was up at 7:30, I know I need to get up earlier but I have had an eye allergy and need extra rest! Okay I will admit I don't really get up much before then. Made 5 lunches, the twins have pre-school today. Dressed the kids, showered, hair and make-up! searched the whole house for Oliver's lunchbox..... then drink bottle. Big kids left for school, drove twins to pre-school. I then went and bought some canvases. (I am going to paint and sell them for kids bedrooms) Went to the gym and did a pump class at 10:30. After pump I did my first Christmas shopping and bought 3 gifts. I also got myself a case for my new iphone!! Came home at around 12:40, to the horrendous house! (These pics I am going to post are making me have heart palpitations, not even my own mum has ever seen my house in a state like this!) Turned up the music, and cleaned like a maniac for the next 2 and a half hours!

Sienna loves to cut and paste at the moment, she made all this mess before she left for pre-school, and even pasted all the paper to the floor!!

Noah and Landon, this is typical for them in the mornings, they clean it if I point to each thing individually, that seems to be the only way they see the mess!



Noah draws every morning before school and then again as soon as he is home, his artwork really is incredible!



Oli was sliding around the house in a sleeping bag all morning!

the twins room, occasionally they try and make their beds, not today.

some washing I folded then put away

Aaah the way I like it to look!!

the floor still a little wet! But I did get all the glue off it!

the boys room looking much better!

I am sure this is already a mess again!

the twins room, this will stay spotless until about a minute after they come home and Sienna puts on a new outfit!

After cleaning I took the big boys up to school to see Laith's artwork on display, we picked up the twins from pre-school. We then all went and did a full grocery shop, yes me and 5 kids!! Then home to unpack, cook dinner, and prepare family night! Not to mention bathing all the kids and a final load of washing! So there you have it, that's what I and most women who are stay at home mum's do all day!! ;-)

When we got home the twins wanted to have an ice-block, I said okay you can eat it in the bath!! (hoping to preserve my mopped floors at least until dinner time!) It was bath time anyway, then Sienna walks up with her ice-block dripping all over the floor I say get a bowl! She yells I need to go to the toilet, I say "Well don't put the ice-block on the bench, get a bowl!" (wanting to keep the benches clean for at least an hour) then I call to Landon, "Can you please get Sienna a bowl? She needs to do a wee!" He says in a confused voice  "Why can't she just use the toilet?" hahaha,

Beach Wedding

Yesterday Damion and I went, without our children, to my cousin Kristian's wedding! It was a great day. He and his gorgeous bride Sally, were married on Werri beach, which is about 2hours south of Sydney. The weather was perfect, the location was stunning, everyone looked beautiful and it was so great to be able to see all my cousins again.

My Nan and Pa have a great legacy. They have 7 children, 24 grandchildren, and 12 great-grandchildren! (I hope I haven't left anyone out) So it is a rare occasion to get a big group of us altogether! Even though I don't get to see them all as often as I would like, when we are together there is alot of love and good feelings. Damion and I always leave feeling lucky to have such a great extended family.

Seeing my cousins yesterday brought back so many great memories. My grandparents live at Gerroa, and alot of my cousins live in Gerringong which is the next town. Growing up we would often come down for holidays and my dads sister with her 7 boys would be there also. We all had a great time together going to the beach, riding our bikes around spending all of our holiday money at the  local shop and exploring the rock pools. Our favourite thing of all however, was to write notes to nan and pa's neighbour the witch!!  Getting the guts to creep up and slide the note under the front door of the vacant holiday house scared us half to death!! We had to be extra sly because if our parents knew what we were up to we would be in HUGE trouble!! We loved to tell stories about the Witch, and freak each other out!! I was the only girl cousin for alot of the years, but the boys were always lovely to me and included me in all the things they did! Being the only girls meant Corinne and I were Pa's favourite!!

The speeches yesterday and at any wedding are always the highlight of the day. There are always lots of laughs and good feelings in wedding speeches! Kristian's speech was really lovely, he made special mention of the grandparents there, Nan and Pa and Sally's grandparents, and his little Niece Layla saying that the oldest and  youngest are the most important at any family event, which is so true!! He also spoke of my Uncle Paul who recently died of Cancer, and is missed every day, especially yesterday! Being with family whether it is immediate or extended is really special, knowing you are all connected to each other creates a real feeling of unity, support and love! I don't know how much longer my Pa will be with us, that makes me sad. I do know however, that the family he and nan have created will continue to go on forever!

Kids Bedrooms

Creating great spaces for kids is one of my passions! I really believe that a childs environment should be something that reflects their personality and helps to develop their imaginations! It is sometimes difficult to find great things to put into a childs bedroom. Great bedlinen is the first place to start. I have painted alot of canvases for my kids rooms over the years, and occasionally I will paint straight onto the walls. I am always looking for new ideas and ways to change their rooms. I want them to have somewhere special to go, to play, to create, do their homework in, hang out with their mates, be alone, or just to read in! Here are a few of the things I have done.

This Christmas I am redecorating Noah and Landons room, they have outgrown the pirate theme. I will have more on that as I go!!

Sienna's Concert!

 Having 4 boys in the family I assumed that my daughter would be a bit of a tom-boy! This is definitely not the case. Sienna is as girly as you can get. She has been into makeup, and shoes, and pink, and barbies since before she could even talk! I know I am partly to blame for this! I think I painted her nails red for the first time when she was about 2months old! When Kesh and Tim got married she had french gel polish on her toes! (the benefits of having a mum who is a beautician) She was in hospital once when she was not even two, and the only thing that made her smile the whole time was her pink tutu!!

Sienna in hospital wearing a tutu, and applying lip gloss!

The boys have always been so lovely with Sienna, they are very protective of her. She always has lots of people who want to kiss and cuddle her, read her stories, and tell her how beautiful she looks. She is very lucky to have 4 brothers to look after her, being the only girl is definitely a great position to be in the family!

Today was a great day, Sienna had her first ever dance concert! We were all a bit nervous for her and wondered if she would even make it onto the stage!! Sienna started dance classes not long after we moved up and loves it! Wednesday is her favourite day because she gets to dance. There have been two times I was allowed in to watch her and she froze and refused to do any of her moves, so I was worried she would get on the stage today and the same thing would happen. She was very excited getting ready as she got to wear pink lipstick, pink blush, pink eyeshadow, mascara, and have her toes and fingers painted pink as well!! So I was thinking this was a good sign! We all went to watch her. The boys were really excited. Throughout the concert they were asking when is Sienna on?  When is Sienna on?? Her dance was the 7th on the program, so Oli in particular was getting very anxious for it to be Siennas turn! Then, before the curtain was lifted it was all quiet, and Laith yelled out "GO SIENNA"!! We were all screaming, and cheering!! When I saw her I almost cried! She looked so cute! She had a big smile on her face. She did all the right things, and was in time with the music! The boys were so proud of her, at the end of her dance Oli turned to Dame and gave him the biggest smile ever. Then Oli threw his arms around Dames neck and hugged him so tight. He was just so excited and proud of Sienna! It was such a lovely moment! At the end of the concert all the dancers got a trophy. As soon as we collected her the boys rushed to congratulate her. Tonight at dinner, Dame brought the garlic bread over to me to give me first choice! Oli questioned this order and asked "Why does mummy get the first garlic bread?" Laith quickly responded "because mummy is very special to daddy." Then Oli said in a serious tone "But the most amazing dancer ever, who is Sienna should get it first!" We all burst out laughing and then agreed! Sienna was beaming!

It was a really special day, to see my kids all supporting their sister. They were genuinely happy for her and proud of her! I want them to all remember this, and to continue to support each other in their interests and achievements! I am so glad to be a mummy to 5 fantastic kids!!

Daddy's Girl

There is something special about a little girl's relationship with her daddy. After having 3 boys my husband in particular was desperate for a little girl! Damion is a fantastic dad and he loves all the kids so much, but there is an extra special bond he has with Sienna. She can make him melt, and she brings out a real softness in him. I love watching them together. I love seeing his face when she walks into the room to show him a pretty new dress she is wearing! I love seeing Dame read to the twins every night before they go to bed. I love seeing Sienna when she does something to make Dame proud of her, like make her bed, or share toys, or complete a puzzle. She wants his approval and love and he is such a great daddy! There are two best daddy's in the world!! Sienna has one of them, and I have the other!!

I have always been a daddy's girl, from the day I was born he was putty in my hands. Apart from when I started dating (that's another blog) I could pretty much get what I wanted from my dad, whether I needed a cuddle and some words of encouragement or if I needed to borrow his car, I had him figured out. All he needed was my love and affection in return and that was easy, he was after all the worlds best dad. ( at this stage, Damion was just a dad in the making!!)

 My dad could do magic tricks, he could talk to fire and make chocolate appear in his hands by simply saying "Abracadabra, simsalabim!" He had the biggest muscles I had ever seen and, he could blow them up and make them even bigger by simply putting his thumb in his mouth!! My dad had the best stories from when we was a rugby player nick named 'maddog'! We loved hearing his stories because this only proved to us how big and strong he was, and we knew no-one would dare to hurt us because he would give them a knuckle sandwich.... or much worse!! My dad took us on the best holidays ever, whether it was to a caravan park or Disneyland we always had so much fun! Holidays were really important to dad, and we went on lots! My dad taught me how to ride my bike, gave me elephant rides to bed at night, was the green monster in our swimming pool, and gave us the biggest hugs and tickles. He read us stories at night and told me he loved me every single day. Dad always called me princess, and I felt like one, in fact he still calls me princess when he calls or texts me. Maybe the best thing my dad ever did or does is love my mum, there was so much security for me in that knowledge that he loved my mum more than anything else!

 As I got older I would try to do things for my dad to let him know how great I thought he was, and this is probably why I am his favourite child!! haha. I would write my dad cards telling him why I loved him, I also made him notes with smiley faces on them, the eyes were coconut roughs and the mouth was a mars bar. I would organise the other kids to set up the table and we would all get dressed in our best clothes and cook and serve mum and dad candlelit dinners. I always gave him lots of cuddles. Even now when I really need to convince my dad of  something, all I have to do is kiss and cuddle him and he is putty!!

Whether it is big girls and their daddy or little girls and their daddy it is the same, we want to feel loved, adored and protected and they want to feel loved, adored and needed. My dad still tells me he loves me up to the stars, and that is good, because I love him up to the stars and back!!

dad when he was dating mum.

Dad, Ben, baby Corinne, and me.

Me, Rin, Josh, Ben and dad

On my wedding day with mum and dad

All the kids, Corinne, Dad, Mum Tim (brother in law) Kesh, Caleb, Josh, Me, Ben,  on Kesh and Tims wedding day.

The Best years!

My dad comes from a family of  9, that's 7 kids!! When I was younger I wanted to have 8 kids so I could beat my nan!! I increased the number of kids I wanted to 12, (after staying a night with a friend who came from a family of 12!!) then when I watched my own mum give birth to my baby brother when I was 20years old, that number was halved to 6!!.....I ended up with 5, and was lucky to get that!! The twins at the end were a HUGE surprise and Dame nearly jumped off a cliff when we found out! So 5 it is, not really even close to my nan, who I really wanted to be like growing up. In fact both of my nans are incredible women who have been amazing examples to me of mothers, but that is another blog!! Today I wanted to talk about the best years!! I am in them right now, I am very aware of this, and time is going fast!!

My dads mum has always told me the best years of her life where when her children were all little! An interesting concept for some, it seems many women can't wait until the day their baby is out of nappies then walking, then talking, then off to pre-school and school, and finally in high school!! Not my Nan, she loved having her children all at home and together where she could look after them, cook and clean for them and love them, and I get her. I really do know that these are the best years ever!

I am not saying it has always been easy, the early years with the twins were really difficult for me. Damion was a great help when he was home, but while he worked I did the daily routine on my own. Grocery shopping was very challenging, feeding them, sleepless nights, I wondered if I would make it through the day sometimes. I did make it through the day, and then the next day, but I had to learn to sometimes say no. I didn't do the things that other mums with one baby did, I didn't go to mothers groups, I didn't spend much time with friends, I didn't have much left in my tank most days. So I did the necessities, and focused on my family. Then when the twins turned 3 life started getting easier.

Now I have more to give again, and life is good. I can manage my days and my time, I have only 2 at home now and they are at a really great age! These are the best years, it is a small window. Soon I will hit the teenage years and have emotional struggles instead of physical sleep deprived ones! Right now though, my kids love me, they listen to me, they talk to me about what is bothering them. They know I am here to make their life better, soon they will accuse me of trying to ruin their life!! Every now and then I am reminded that this time right now is good it is really good. I was reminded of this just today. On Monday night we had a family night, we do this every week, we sing songs together have a lesson, play games and then have treats! Mondays lesson was on co-operation! There hasn't been much of that in the Tucci home lately. I had been feeling more like a slave than a mum, cooking and cleaning and being ignored when I asked for help. Sound familiar? I had been folding the washing asking the kids to join in, and no-one could hear me, or so they later told me. That night during our lesson, I had a bit of a rant and rave about the afternoon routine. The afternoon routine consists of kids walking in the door, throwing bags on the floor, asking what is to eat, eating, making mess, not cleaning up, going outside to ride bikes or play on the wii, asking what's to eat an hour later, more mess etc. I said instead of this routine I would appreciate "Hi mum, how was your day?" In response to me asking about their day, then bags up to rooms, afternoon tea, clean up their own mess, then ask "Is there anything I can help you with mum!" "Thanks for making cookies mum" etc!!!! I thought I was talking to myself but still I needed to demand this out loud just to vent my frustration!! Guess what, it actually worked!! Today the kids came home, all hugged me, smelled the cookies said "Yum thanks so much mum, you are the best cooker, you should go on master chef for desserts and baking!!" Then took their bags upstairs and asked what they could do to help! I said, come into the (scary) garage (that is dark and full of spiders) and help me find the Christmas decorations, which they all did, going in there with torches. They all helped me carry everything into the house set up the tree, clean up the boxes!! They then told me the new reindeer I had bought was so awesome and that I am really good at putting stuff together!!! Yes this is all true!! Of course in return I gave them lots of cuddles and praised their amazing new attitudes and thanked them for listening to me and wanting to help and expressed my happiness and disbelief in what was actually occurring!! A sensational mum day!! How long will it last? It is probably already over, but I don't care today was perfect, and that is enough for now!!!

Oli looking tough in his biker dress-up, braving the back garage with his toy story torch!! sooo cute! 

                                                Sienna admiring the newly decorated tree!!

                                                                 My new reindeer!!!

Saying "I love you"

I have been reflecting alot on my childhood lately. I come from a family of 6 kids, I am the eldest. I love all of my brothers and sisters very much. Growing up we all got along really well, in fact at night we would yell out to each other before we went to sleep I love you Ben, I love you Josh, I love you Rin, I love you Keshy.... Caleb my little brother was only 5months old when I got married so he never got his name called out!! (But every now and then I make sure I tell him.) This nightly ritual was perhaps done in a bit of a jovial way, but we all knew that we actually meant it, we really did love each other, and we could say it, which I think is pretty rare! This stemmed from when we were really little, when we fought with each other if mum and dad ever heard us they would make us hug each other and say sorry and then tell the person we were fighting with that we loved them! As we got older and the teenage fights got more serious we still had the same  consequences, to say sorry, hug and say I love you. We hated this, in fact I can even remember having quiet fights so we wouldn't be discovered by mum and dad and could then avoid having to hug and say I love you! Looking back now I see the wisdom in their parenting, without realising mum and dad were teaching us that no matter what we hated each other for during our fights, at the end of the day deep down we really loved each other! I would like to think that is still the same today.

Sienna my 4year old is very concerned with being loved and needs to be regularly reassured of this, she often comes to me and says "Landon doesn't love me", or "Oliver loves you more than me mum" Or when I get cranky she says "But do you still love me?" "Of course I still love you" I say, "I always love you, even when I am cranky, or happy, or sad, always" We say it all the time in our family it is something I feel is really important to say it and to show it. I want my kids to be each others best friends, to never be jealous of one another, and to be loyal to each other and know they have each others backs. That is one of the biggest benefits of being in a large family, is that you always have a best friend at home. The need to be loved and feel loved is such a constant and volatile thing! It seems that no matter how much we feel loved one day we need those feelings to be reinforced again the next day, especially when we are young.

Unconditional love is the most important thing I think a parent can give a child, or family members can give to each other, to feel loved no matter what, to know that is never withdrawn can help a child or an adult to feel secure and to belong and to feel of worth as a human being. My best friend has "unconditional love" tattooed on her arm, so she can be reminded of the need to give it and to feel it every day! I am not saying this is what we all need to do, but I think if we have it constantly on our minds we will be better parents and better family members.

 I absolutely know that my mum and dad love me unconditionally. They are terrific parents and I know they did and continue to do the best job they can. I also know my husband loves me unconditionally, his love is a constant in my life, and without it I would feel very lost. I hope my kids know that my love for them is unconditional, of course I have hopes and dreams for them, but no matter what roads they take I will never stop wanting them around, I will never stop giving them hugs and telling them I love them!!

My family, Kesh, Josh, Caleb, Me, Rin, Ben, Mum, Dad

Me and my amazing hubby!!

the kids and I driving home from Melbourne!

At the park with the kids near our house

the water 5 minutes from our home, love walking along here with the family to see the sun set!!

When I grow up!!

Landon my number 3 boy, who is 7 is a very cool kid!! He is easy going, always happy and loves to be funny! In fact this week he has been in some big trouble at school for playing the 'air-trumpet' in the remembrance day assembly!! I was very upset to hear about this behaviour. We go to church together every sunday and all the kids have to sit still for a long time, so showing respect is something Landon is pretty used to doing. When I confronted him about this he said in a very convincing tone "But mum, I just have to be funny, I can't stop it. When people around me are bored I just want to make them happy" I tried to explain that there is a time and place for that, but he still seemed a bit unphased by the whole thing.

One thing Landon is really great at doing is making friends. He is the kind of kid who will go to the park and a few minutes after we arrive come walking over with his arm around some random kid who is his new best friend. He is very confident, and just knows how to make people like him.

This weekend he has had his mate Logan staying here. Logan is practically family and very similar to Landon in personality. These two have a real ball together and are always planning the next time they can hang out before the current play day is even over. Last night Landon says to me "Mum, me and Logan are always going to be best friends, and when we grow up we are going to live together in QLD"  Logan pipes up "And Jess, we are going to go on our holidays to Fiji!" Then Logan turns to Landon excitedly saying "Hey Landon when we live in QLD do you want to go to a different theme park every week?" And Landon is laughing and says back "Yeah that will be so cool."

I love when my kids make plans for when they grow up, they are often very funny and quite unrealistic. I remember once Landon telling me that when he grew up he was going to live in the same street as me and Laith could live around the corner and Noah could live next door to him and the twins could live next door to Dame and I. I had a bit of a laugh and asked why he thought that would be such a good idea, and he responded "Cause then I could still come home for dinner because I don't know how to cook!!" I am going to show him this blog in about 10years time when he wants nothing to do with me!! Maybe by then he will be living in QLD with Logan!!

Bossy Boots!!

I have just been sitting outside with my twins eating lunch on our deck, while they chat to me about stuff! Whenever my kids talk to me they make me laugh!! Sienna has her dancing concert coming up in a bit over a week, she is very excited! She loves dancing, and she is especially excited about wearing lipstick! She was just telling me all about her dream, about her concert....it has lots of stairs going up up up, there are chairs everywhere and purple curtains, and she is going to dance high on the big big stage with a floor and everyone will watch her! After she finished telling me, she said  "thats what I have been dreaming about!"As she was telling me all of this in great detail and even greater expression and animation, Oliver who was sitting on my lap did a huge fart, then burst out laughing. Straight away Sienna told him off, and said in disbelief  "Oli, you are supposed to say excuse me!!" Oli just kept laughing and threw his head back and said "but I can't talk,... it's too funny!!"

Sienna loves to help, she also loves to boss people around and tell them what they should be doing, she even tells Oli what to say when they are playing with the little people together. Yesterday I overheard them playing and Oli  was repeating everything she was saying. I said "Oli you should say your own words, Sienna let Oli say what he wants to." and she replied "but he doesnt know how to do it mum!"

When they were about 18months old, I would take them shopping and people would always stop and say "Ow twins you are so lucky" then they would look at the twins and ask  "what are your names?"  Sienna would always say "Hi, Im Sienna, that is Oliver he's shy."

Oliver is definately not shy anymore, but  sure enough Sienna is still telling him what to say!!

                                        





               

      



Building Confidence in Kids

It is a week tomorrow since Noahs accident. He hasnt been back to school yet and is feeling very anxious about it!! We moved to the Central Coast from Kellyville about 9months ago. The move has been harder on our kids than I expected it would be. They miss their old school and friends, and regularly ask why we made them move?

It is hard for the kids to see the benefits in moving, even though to me, they are very obvious. We now have a bigger house, 10minutes from the beach, we have a pool, the kids can ride their bikes around the street as the area is alot quieter, the school is a 5minute walk up the hill, and they all have friends within walking distance. I am hoping that by next year there will be other new families at the school and our kids will feel alot more settled here.

Making new friends can be hard, sometimes it takes a while to really feel like you belong and fit in. Last week Noahs friend Ryan popped in to see how he was feeling and told him that some of the kids at school had laughed when Ryan told them what had happened to Noah!! Being a protective mum I immediately felt like I needed to march up to school with pictures of Noahs accident and the blood on the road (photos taken by my 7 year old Landon, while I was cleaning Noah up in the bathroom!) and demand sympathy and support! I discussed my plans with Noah and he suddenly seemed more worried about what I would do than his so-called friends!! I decided I needed to find another way to ease his concerns and build his confidence!
I googled "self conscious" and after a bit of sifting got onto a great site with some great ideas. These ideas can be great for kids and adults!! I wrote some of the relevant points down and took my list to Noah so we could talk about it together. This is how our conversation went...

Me;" Hey Noah I want to talk to you about going back to school tomorrow, I know you are feeling worried but I found some stuff on the internet that I think can really help you.
1. Recognise your insecurities. Noah what are you feeling worried about tomorrow?" Noah then told me he was worried about being teased becasue of how he looked. We talked about all the possible things kids might say and I pretended to be kids teasing him. He was laughing hysterically because he thought my acting was so good and that I really meant it when I said he looked soooooo gross!! We discussed some things he might say back to the kids teasing him like "You should have seen me last week, I look good now, or you should see the other guy I had a punch up with." ( dads idea of course)
2. Identify your success. We talked about what Noah is really good at why kids at school really like him, he is a great drawer some kids pay money for his pictures! He is also very funny.We talked about how his sore mouth wasnt going to change any of that!!
3. Be thankful for what you have. We talked about how it could have been worse he could have cracked his head open and then needed to get his head shaved so they could stitch it, which would have been devestating for Noah because he LOVES his hair!!
4. Look in the mirror and smile. This was a good one, he has a great smile and I havent seen much of it over the last week.
5. Fake it. We decided if his friends were mean then he should act like it doesnt bother him even if it does, because then they would get bored and stop.
6. Help others. If he helped other kids tomorrow he wont be worried about himself so much.
7. Always keep a smile on your face. Everyone wants to be friends with someone who is happy and makes them feel happy too.

The conversation went really well, he was laughing and feeling so much more relaxed about tomorrow. I think we sometimes forget the value of talking to our kids. With 5 kids at home sometimes it is hard for me to create times where I can talk to them really well one on one. The days that I manage to really look for that time I am so glad I did, it always goes well, kids love to be heard as much as adults do. They have things of worth to say and that is how we get to find out who they really are, and how we can address their concerns, help them to feel loved and build their confidence.

                             Noah doing a Noah's Ark puzzle given to him from Nanna Coulson.

Noahs farewell sleep over before we moved.

Having lots of people who love you at home always helps too.